Voices

So my year at Mountview continues. I can’t lie…the first month has been extremely tiring and stressful. With jet lag, work overload, and strict technical dance class, my body was shutting down.

The first week I had to present a monologue from a northern British play. Over my winter break I searched for some; however, all my efforts were inconclusive. It wasn’t until my last few weeks that I found a play called Road by Jim Cartwright online. I expedite ordered it, hoping that it would arrive but it never came.

I began to panic because I dislike leaving things until the last minute. Not only did I have to memorize this monologue, I had to do it in a northern England accent. I couldn’t differentiate that accent from a regular British accent. I struggle with the general London phonetics sometimes. Thus, for me this assignment seemed almost impossible.

Luckily, I finally got the monologue and the accent tutorials out of the school library the day before the assignment was due. I memorized it with no problem; however, I still felt as though it wasn’t in my body because of the accent. I couldn’t understand if I was doing it correctly. When it came time for my performance I waited until everyone had gone: Due to nerves and so I could hear what the correct sound of the accent was.

Nothing could prepare me for this, though. The teacher sat at a table as if this was an audition and my peers, some of which were from Northern England, sat in two rows behind her. When my time came to present I kept stopping—I was thinking that I was probably insulting people with my interpretation of the accent and that I just couldn’t do it correctly. Then I was frustrated with myself because I felt like I was failing…miserably. I’d start the monologue, then get to a point and draw a blank because I was thinking about how to say it. I just wanted to take the fail and sit down, but my teacher wouldn’t let me. So I continued to try to shake it out and just go for it.

Well, all I can say is the 5^th time was the charm. I knew all the lines the accent came through and I really committed to the character. Personally, this was one of the biggest challenges because I’m not used to messing up when it comes to acting and when I do, I something inside me is just disappointed with myself. My teacher told me that whenever we expose ourselves, there is a sense of fight or flight and no matter what goes wrong, we have to fight to finish the task at hand. In addition, she wasn’t going to let me take a seat because she said she knew I could do this.

The next task on my list was performing my legend, which was Aretha Franklin. Not only did we have to perform our legends, we had to be them for the entire class. We all had on costumes and took on their personas. So I sat amongst Tina Turner, Frank Sinatra, Barbra Streisand, and other famous legends. This day was truly hilarious and fun! In the end, the Head of Singing told us to remember what this felt like and that we should embrace our talent and be confident in what we are doing. We can’t let the stress, fear of failing or nerves get in our way.

I’ve noticed here that sometimes as students we feel we always have to be perfect; we have to get it right the first time and that there is no room for error. But in fact, this is the place to be wrong, to mess up, crack on a note or forget a line because it’s a safe space. The teachers would rather you do it here than out in the West End or on Broadway. It’s all about trial and error, exposing ourselves and growing as individuals.

I’ve noticed that the challenges continue to pile up this term. The difference is that we have dance assessments coming up in March, in addition to singing assessments and voice assessments. On top of that we have plays that we have late practices for; mine is called A Week With Tony, in which I’m playing two characters, Penny and Ursula. Then on top of that every week we are learning new monologues, working on The Glass Menagerie, and have to continually find British Contemporary songs to work on.

Additionally, the technical aspect of dance skyrocketed. There is so much information download that I swear my mind is reviewing dance sequences in my sleep. In each area of dance, jazz, tap, and ballet we have to learn a routine and specific technical sequences that we’ll have to demonstrate on exam day. Ballet is still my weakest class in my perspective; however, I’m starting to get terms and positions into my muscle memory. I still don’t think I’ll ever be a prima ballerina but at least I’ll be able to fake it until I make it. But seriously, progress is a slow process.

The great thing about all the dancing is that I’m building up my endurance and strength. I’m even able to pick up the choreography fairly quickly. Of course, I have now added Saturdays to my practice schedule as well as early mornings to make sure I get everything ingrained. It’s paying off but I still feel as though I have much to improve on. In class I look crazy at times because I am so focused on the step or how to move correctly. I’m learning how to tuck my pelvis, lift from my knees, elongate my back, and kick turned out amongst so many other things. My head is already spinning from just thinking about it.

So far this term my favorite thing that I’ve done is work on my political speech that we will be getting graded on and present to the student body. At first I found an article on Identity, specifically on the terms African American vs. Blacks. As interesting as it was, it didn’t have the rhetoric that I was looking for.

My teacher led me in the direction of Michelle Obama and we came across her Spelman College 2011 graduation speech. It was full of passion, inspiration, and history. I instantly felt drawn to it; however, my only problem was that I needed to cut the 14 minute speech into 2.5 minutes.

The speech discusses how two white women from the north started the school in a church basement. They had 11 students that were former slaves with different ages. Unfortunately, 130 years ago it was laughable for an African American woman to be educated, especially in the South. Luckily, these women began to create a legacy and opened the door for future students to come. They were in hope of a better future, maybe one that wouldn’t come true for their children or grandchildren or even their great grandchildren but they knew one day something would change.

The speech continues to touch on helping people who may have been discounted, who may feel as though they can not succeed for various reasons. It is the obligation for the graduates to bring them the sense of worth and value that Spelman gave them, that the 11 women gave them. Needless to say, this speech connected to me as well as inspired me. I’m eager to work on it. We will have to present them to the student body, and it will be nice to hear about an array of topics that are normally not discussed at the school. I think it will be refreshing to see what other topics the students are passionate about. In addition, it will probably spark interesting conversations and or debates later.

Until next time